As a 100% narcissist, I know a lot about narcissists. No doubts, a person knows himself better than anyone else. We know our thoughts, thinking, worldview, dreams, ambitions, sexual fetishes, and many other things better than anyone else. I am a narcissist. I say it absolutely openly. Here, on my personal blog, I have no secrets. I don't care about the things people think about me. I am a very frank person. So if someone thinks that narcissism and selfishness are bad things, I will not argue with that person. Everyone is free to have a personal opinion.
As I said before, I am a narcissist. I am not shy to accept this fact. Thus, I know a lot about narcissists and narcissistic personality disorder. I am not as well-informed as professional psychologists. However, I can competently tell a lot of things about narcissists. Today, we will talk about narcissists and friendship. It is not a big secret that some narcissist has no friends. In this blog post, I want to tell you about the main reasons why some narcissists have no friends.
This topic was widely discussed on Quora. Recently, I have published my answer there. Within a few hours, it got thousands of views and upvotes. I decided to give a more thorough answer to this question on my personal blog.
A FEW FACTS ABOUT ME
Before I start the story, let me tell you a few fact about myself. Firstly, I have never had a single friend in my life. I had some companions I used to go to bars, cafes, restaurants, pubs, and other entertainment places in order to pick up girls. It will be absolutely wrong to call these people friends. They were not my friends. 'Pick-up companions' is the right words that will describe them. For me, friendship means something more than just entertainment that unites some people. Thus, I treat the relationship with people very seriously. I don't call everyone as 'a friend of mine'. This is not correct.
You know that I had no friend since my childhood. During my teenage time, I also was absolutely friendless. Actually, I had some female friends. I think that friendship with women is much better and stable. I really like befriending women. They are more sensitive, emotional, and kinder than men. Nowadays, nothing has changed. I have no friends today. Is it a problem for me, No, absolutely no. I am fully satisfied and happy even though I have no friends. Let me come to the main topic of this blog post. Why do narcissists have no friends? Here are the mains reasons why they have no friends.
NARCISSISTIC QUALITIES MAKE NARCISSISTS BAD FRIENDS
Some people love simplifying by saying that narcissists are incapable of friendship due to their qualities. This is partly true. Most of the egotistical people are selfish, ambitious, competitive, arrogant, and manipulative. These qualities repel people away from narcissists.
At the same time, it is wrong to claim that all narcissists are incapable of friendship. Even though narcissists are very self-obsessed, most of them are very communicative and active. The can be generous, kind, and helpful. Narcissism does not automatically ruin all the above-mentioned positive qualities. There is no an absolutely selfless person in this world. We all share some degrees of narcissism, selfishness, and other similar qualities. Hence, we should be very careful while saying that egocentric people are incapable of friendship.
SOME NARCISSISTS DO NOT NEED FRIENDS AT ALL
Some hardcore narcissist does not need any friends at all. This is my case. The inability of being a good friend is not the reason why I have no friends. Actually, I don't need friends at all. As long as my ambitions, plans, and dreams are satisfied, I will be satisfied as well. I don't need friends in order to be happy. This is my state.
Narcissists want to be famous, successful, rich, popular and adored. These are the things that make narcissists happy. Friendship, love, emotions, and other non-materialistic things are not much important for narcissists. Friendship is considered as something really doubtful.
Finally, these are the main reasons why narcissists have no friends. Some of them make bad friends, and therefore, people prefer to stay away from them. Others might be good friends, however, they do not need any friends at all. I belong to the second group of narcissists. My projects take 100% of my time. I have no time for friendship and love.