good interlocutor


good interlocutorLife is all about communication. We have communication in our families, with friends, sellers in stores, colleagues in our offices, and everywhere else. Communication is like air. It is everywhere and every time. If you are a businessman, you already know that good communication skills are crucial to your success. All business and success coaches say that communication is the key factor of success if all spheres of our life. There is no need to say that good communicative skills are paramount to succeed with women. Finally, we all know that communication is king. Now, let us learn how to become a good interlocutor.

An interlocutor is a talker, your speaking partner, a person whom you have a conversation with. So what does make a person a good or a bad interlocutor? This is the thing we are going to explore in this blog post. What is more, I will give some of the most effective tips on how to become a good interlocutor. Since professional communication skills are crucial for success in all spheres of your life, it is absolutely obligatory for you to become a good interlocutor.


Throughout my life, I have read loads of different books on psychology, success, and communication. One of the best authors whose books I devoured was Dale Carnegie. I still use his recommendations on how to communicate with people in a professional manner. He was a very wise person. I am sure all of us benefited from his books.

Dale Carnegie says that actually nobody cares about your interests, hobbies, problems, your life, and other stuff linked to you. He says that everyone is preoccupied with their own problems, desires, ambitions, and interests. This might sound very cynical, however, it is absolutely true. Everyone loves talking their own things. Therefore, a good interlocutor is always a very patient listener. In a conversation, being a patient and an attentive listener is more important than being a good speaker. People love being listened. Everyone wants to be heard. If you listen to your talker, you will become a good interlocutor even if you do not talk at all.

Sometimes, when I am not interested in the things a person tells me, I will try to look like I am highly impressed by the information he gives me. You may think it is hypocrisy to play a role while communicating with people. Actually, psychology is pure hypocrisy. Psychologists and psychiatrists are the most hypocritical people I have ever met in my life. They always wear masks on their faces. They always lie. At the same time, the most of them are professional interlocutors. They know how to listen to a person. Hence, if you want to be a good interlocutor, learn to be a very patient listener.


interestsAs it was stated before, people don't care about your life, interests, problems, hobbies, dreams, plans, ambitions, and all other stuff. We live in the age of narcissism and egoism. People are too individualistic nowadays. Therefore, a good interlocutor always tries to satisfy his conversationalist by talking about the things that are interesting to his talker.

If you keep talking about yourself, your life, your interests, and etc, people will abandon you. Nobody has excessive time to spend it listening to you. At the same time, everyone has tons of free hours to talk about themselves.

While talking to a person, I know that my conversationalist is not much interested in me. Therefore, I always try to talk about my talker's interests. If he or she is interested in fashion, I will start talking about fashion. If business and sport are their main interests, I will start discussing these topics. This is how I talk to people. It is unwise to talk about bodybuilding while having a conversation with a gardener. A bodybuilder won't be much interested in plants. Hence, people have diverse and dissimilar interest. To be a good interlocutor, you will need to always pick up appropriate topics.


When a person starts asking too many questions, I always try to stay away from that individual. I really hate questions. Especially, when a person is intrusive, it makes me very angry. I love people who don't ask any questions. I love discussing different topics on business, bodybuilding, films, and other spheres. However, I always prefer people to stay away from my private life. My age, my sexual orientation, my financial income, my business, my girlfriend, my political views, my address, and much other personal information belong are very intimate. Therefore, I never let anyone approach me more than I want. 

Actually, I am not the only person in the world who hate questions. I am sure that more than 85% of the world's population does not want others to interfere their private life. Too many questions always look suspicious. If you want to be a good interlocutor, try not to ask too many questions. Otherwise, people will hate you. 

Written by Bahtiyar
Bahtiyar is a businessman, Internet marketer, blogger, traveler, and the founder of one of the world's most popular blogs Bahtiyar World.